I am no good at keeping secrets. I want everything to ripple out of me. I wish I could walk around the streets with a big placard that reads
HI I AM PHOEBE, I USE SHE + THEY PRONOUNS, TO ME THEY INDICATES MY QUEERNESS WHEN I FEEL INVISIBLE. I GREW UP IN A REALLY, LIKE REALLY, BIG FAMILY AND THEY ARE SO INTENSELY IMPORTANT TO ME AND I HAVE FAMILY I DO NOT TALK TO. I AM DYSLEXIC. I AM AN EXTREMELY SENSITIVE PERSON AND I CRY WHEN I THINK OF OTTERS.
I wish we all had the context for how supremely fucked up and broken and sad we are all the time and we walk around and get coffee and say “im good” like its some play and the performance has gone on for too long but no one will draw the curtain and the audience never claps or laughs or cheers and the show just keeps going on.
I am no good at holding it all in and maybe if I started this campaign for us to all wear our biggest plaques around our necks then maybe the world would be a nicer place for how sensitive we all truly are. This is my work. To embody all pieces of my humaness and to make and create around them and share because I think when we talk about all bits of ourselves we become less of an island and more connected and we don’t become tired actors on a broken stage. AND! It works. When I started this newsletter in 2020 I had no idea that people would write back, or connect, or relate. I knew I wanted to write write write and knew I only my full self could be present. So in this effort of being my full self and in space that doesn’t feel like I am throwing my heart into a void and instead to be gently held, The Friendship Love Letter is evolving!
The Friendship Love Letter has a podcast! Once a month, from me, right into your little ears for all paid subscribers of the Friendship Love Letter. I am excited for this opporuntiy to chat chat chat in a way that we can all benefit from spiritually + monetarily and for me + you to connect and get off ours phones (!!!).
The first Friendship Love Letter Podcast will arrive for all paid subscribers on Jan 17th and from then on, every third week of the month! To catch the intro + a little tease you can listen here.
I am in constant search for financially sustainable art practise. To me that means sustainable for me to make money and sustainable for you to spend (or not spend) money. The Friendship Love Letter will always be free for as long as spirit allows me to write write write my little heart out and then maybe a little longer because I love to talk and haunting sounds like fun. If it is not in your capacity or interest to become a paid subscriber, hey baby, I am happy you're here!
In the spirit of GRATITUDE and THANK YOU-NESS + NEW THINGS THAT CAN FEEL UNGROUNDING! I am offering 33% off monthly and yearly subscriptions until Feb 1st because WOW I am thankful you’re here
other things I would include on my placard as I walked into coffee shops
stopping on my hikes to listen to the wind, or the silence
I seriously do love otters, my sister gave me some otter socks for Christmas and I cried when I opened them. They hold hands when the swim and use big rocks on their belly to open clams
Searching for the perfect skirt to make (any pattern recommendations?)
Sticking my face into the sun even when it is so so so grey so I imagine the beams warming my face instead
Imagining I am the sun and shining on the faces of the people I love to charge them with my rays 🌞
writing writing writing and not always sharing immediately and instead simmering 🍵
Not planning at all maybe trying to do the Year Compass but also probably only getting through the first third like i usually do and then using it as a coaster for the rest of the year!!! 🕯
BIG BLESSINGS TO CHANGE!! AND TO BEING THE RAW LITTLE BABY BEANS WE ACTUALLY ARE AND NOT THESE ACTORS THAT JUST SAY THEY ARE OKAY AND TO LEADING IN MESSY WAYS TO BEING AND CONNECTING TOGETHER AS ONE.
I love you all
xx
Phoebe 💖